Sunday, January 1, 2012

Racism still the issue!!


If there is anybody who tells you or wants you to believe that the country has reached post-racial issues or anywhere in the world for that matter, well...that is just loads of BS.

I wanna share and jot down for my own record two 'racist' encounters i had in 1 day, in 2 different location.

Situation A:
yours truly had just arrived in a shopping complex's parking basement, trying (not frantically) to find an open spot when suddenly i saw 2 'c' ladies side by side presumably just finished loading in their goods in the trunk and still checking their goods (counting them i guess) and so i stopped my car, gave a signal, lowered my window and trying to ask them whether they are going out. Mind you i was jusssssssssssssssssssssssssssssst beside them and they just completely ignored my existence. Still, patiently I waited in the car waiting for them or one of them to look at my way to ask the same question or making a gesture of asking them the question....waited for about 5 minutes (mind you, i am completely open to the idea of waiting should they confirmed to me they are going out as it was lunch time and i knew finding a spot would be a challenge elsewhere) SUDDENLY, one of the lady looked at me, and I smiled while making that 'are you going out' gesture with my hand when she just looked at me in disgust and a frown (and very fierce, annoyed face) that 'NO, am not going out (or anywhere i supposed)"

LOGICALLY: the two ladies could have just acknowledged to me that they have no intention of leaving the moment i stopped my car and signaled as the indication of waiting and wanting to take over the spot once they got out. THERE IS NO WAY they could have not known my presence, i was in a car big enuff to see (although relatively my car was a compact car, small local made compared with them - a local sedan). Either they are simply racist when they saw me a 'M' with small local car (indication i am poor or lower income group) OR they are two completely heartless morons with no courtesy to tell others who clearly waiting for the parking spot. I wanted to go for the latter (while waiting i contemplated the idea- they're just morons, selfish, uncivilized morons)BUT the moment she looked at me with that disgusted face, i conclude with they being racist. can't help it. that looked i would never forget as if i was some scum trying to beg them some money. Fuck you!

Situation B:
it was later of the same day, around 10 pm after the three of us (hub, 3 year old daughter and yours truly) went to grab some easy-peasy late dinner before heading home - so easiest pick - mcD. we chose to dine-in as i saw there was a nice comfy playground within the air-conditioned eating area, as my 3 year old loves playground just like most kids, we decided to dine-in. So while hub was buying the food, i took my 3 year old to the playground that had 2 kids occupying the place already, oh wait ...2 "C" kids , 1 gal presumably the same age or a bit older than mine and a younger boy presumably her brother. my reaction immediately was these kids were siblings as they were playing happily together and the bigger gal was quite protective of the boy. BUT that was it, all i saw at first was just KIDS regardless of the race and although my daughter was a bit apprehensive about joining in the fun as she always does (she's really really scared/extremely shy of strangers) i waited with my kid to ensure that it's safe and fun to play with the other 2 kids. so, just like any mother would and the way i always do - i gave a few 'rules' and reminders to my kid when playing with others - don't push, wait for your turn on the slides and most importantly for my kid - don't scream too much! as she can get to be overly joyed and 'lose' herself in the playground.

so there i was standing on one corner, watching quietly my kid actions while running to her aid every now and then like when she overslipped or bumped her butt on the slides the wrong way - she was her normal self - extremely happy and innocently thinking that the other two kids was also playing with her. but just as the fun was starting, suddenly the bigger gal tapped on the glass walls separating the playground to the smoking eating area where her parents sit to eat - she screamed "papa" numerously while tapping and said "this is my papa, papa papa" frantically while the younger boy also copied her "papa, papa, this is my papa". of course when this fiasco was going on, my daughter was startled and stopped playing and baffled why 'her friends' tapping the glass - my daughter was worried and called me softly "mummy". I said, "nothing dear, keep playing.if you don't let's sit and eat your fried chicken". Of course my daughter didn't want to, she chose play time over meal time.

then, the mother of these children came to the rescue, frantically just like her children and uttered in mandarin "wa she ma" (what's wrong? i understood this only and i knew it's mandarin) and she continued speaking in mandarin of course not to my advantage - couldn't understand anything. BUT I CAN DEDUCE, the girl was telling/ reporting/complaining her mummy about my daughter (as she was pointing to my little girl) but the little boy didn't say anything just looking at me at times while this was going on. Then i believed the mother finished comforting the kids, she went back to her seat and the bigger gal slowly continued to play apprehensively and at times looking at me. I KNEW AND COULD SENSE THAT something about my daughter playing along that doesn't please her or something and i was already feeling disgusted by this. still keeping my cool, i tried to convince my kid that it's probably best to leave the playground and eat but she wasn't keen as she sees the other kids was resuming the fun - she didn't want to miss that she said "taknak, Hana nak main mummy".

So i retreated to my little corner and looked at the order of the children's playing ; first the bigger gal, followed by the young boy, and last my kid..they went up the little stairs they were going down the slides i saw the bigger gal raised her hand and showed "STOPPED" gesture to my kid with a fierce face. Of course my kid got little scared. she retreated. I still didn't interfere. then after the two kids went down, i called on my daughter and asked her that it is ok to slide down and she complied. then this bigger gal continued that stopped gesture again to my daughter the second time, again and again not letting her play together with them and scaring her with that.

after a few times I could not stand the sight and I called for my daughter to stopped playing and come with me - she finally gave in of course with a pouting lips and sulking face. hub came and held her to our table which was directly in front of the playground's entrance. My daughter couldn't understand why she can't play, so i explained that it's time to eat and just as i was eating moments later i saw the bigger gal also stopped playing and went out to her mom. BUT WHAT MAKES ME FEEL ANNOYED is that the two kids weren't siblings afterall. In fact the little boy's dad was sitting beside us and the bigger gal's parents was outside in the open eating area.

Seeing that I made a conclusion that put a label to the situation.

A) That bigger gal was a tiny miss racist, when she saw us - the "M" - came in "intruding" her "space" and "sharing" that playground she went frantic, even called the mother tapping the glass. then miss senior racist came in gave me a look as if i was troubling her child, talked in words i couldn't understand and leave the place with her kid who was then after kept showing STOPPED signs to my daughter each time my daughter wants to tail them up and down the slides, she stopped my daughter looked at my little girl's face as if warning her not to come too closely.

B) now i probably won't over-judge this if only that little boy was in fact turned to be her brother. BUT the boy WASN'T. the boy was a stranger just like my daughter was to miss tiny racist, BUT SHE DIDN'T STOPPED HIM PLAYING CLOSELY WITH HER, instead was 'protecting' her fellow race blood to play safely, so protective that i initially thought the boy was her brother.

ALAS, am nauseated with the incidents. NOW tell me if my girl was fair skin, small eyes, straight hair and speaks mandarin, I AM SURE THAT BIGGER GAL WOULD HAVE 'PROTECTED' MY DAUGHTER TOO and played with her happily and not 'spooked' by the fact that my daughter is 'M' race.

OF course i am not saying that it's the girl's fault to have that mindset, poor her -it comes from the parents - the miss senior racist was already instilling seeds of hatred to her offsprings, and her 'racist parenting' showed evidence at such tender age on a place so public and innocent as a playground!!! and our leaders are saying let's put race behind, the Malays especially have them as brothers and sisters of equally rights without prejudice ...when they can't even tolerate a Malay little girl playing along, can we expect should their 'kind' holds much bigger power they'll treat us equally??? NO WAY!

Racism doesn't need words, the actions, the body-language that uneasiness when aother race is within close proximity with you, you start seeing color, you talk in words the others don't understand (ok so u can say ur BM is horrible, but am sure you can speak ENG) the simple words "it's ok, play along kids" would have been fine.

SURE there were other 360 degree of non-racist encounters i've had at various other playground. The parents were fine, we let our kids play together, when the kids 'fight' we speak in language all of us can understand - we didn't see colors, we see kids playing and wanting to have fun. it is a sad thing that there's still these kinds of morons around us. I am worried with my kid's future.

in the meantime, take some racism test...

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